As a coach, I've witnessed countless transformative moments in coaching sessions where emotions create profound openings for growth. I want to explore the artistry of holding space for these powerful moments, sharing frameworks that have emerged from years of developing culturally responsive, trauma-informed coaching approaches. The goal of this article is to give coaching professionals additional tools for your toolbox, and to normalize being present with emotions during a coaching session.
The Power of Presence: A Deeper Understanding
The sacred art of holding space and navigating strong emotions involves being present. Presence in coaching isn't just about being physically present – it's about creating a container where transformation can unfold naturally. When a client experiences strong emotions, whether it's grief that leaves them speechless or anger that needs expression, our presence becomes the foundation for their exploration.
True presence involves:
Embodied Awareness: Being fully attuned to both our own and our client's energy
Emotional Capacity: Holding space without becoming overwhelmed
Cultural Responsiveness: Recognizing how cultural context shapes emotional expression
Mindful Observation: Noticing subtle shifts in energy, tone, and body language
Sacred Silence: Allowing pauses that invite deeper reflection
When we maintain presence, we communicate to our clients that all emotions are welcome. This isn't about fixing or changing their experience – it's about creating a brave space where they can fully encounter their truth.
Frameworks for Holding Space: My Coaching Models in Action
At Reid Ready Life Coaching, and in my coaching practice, I have developed specific frameworks that support coaches in maintaining presence during emotionally charged sessions. Here is how these models work together to create transformative coaching experiences.
The MIND™ Model: Foundation for Emotional Presence
Meditate: Grounding ourselves in present-moment awareness, especially when emotions intensify
Investigate: Exploring emotions with cultural sensitivity and trauma awareness
Notice/Note: Observing verbal and non-verbal cues without judgment
Decide/Do: Partnering with clients in how to honor their emotional wisdom
How MIND™ Supports Strong Emotions: When a client is experiencing intense feelings, the MIND™ model helps coaches maintain their center while creating space for the client's experience. It reminds us to stay grounded, curious, and attentive without getting caught in the story or trying to fix the emotion.
The Jasiri Kweli Approach: Truth-Telling in Emotional Moments
This model specifically addresses how to:
Hold space for unexpressed truths
Navigate cultural and emotional complexities
Support clients in standing in their authentic experience
Challenge internalized limitations with compassion and courage
How Jasiri Kweli Supports Strong Emotions: This approach helps coaches create a container where clients can express their deepest truths without fear of judgment. It's particularly powerful when emotions surface around identity, cultural experience, or systemic challenges.
The BRAVE Framework: Emotional Safety in Action
B - Breathe and ground yourself in challenging moments
R - Respect the client's cultural and emotional experience
A - Allow silence to do its sacred work
V - Validate without trying to fix
E - Engage with empathy and cultural humility
How BRAVE Supports Strong Emotions: This framework provides practical steps for maintaining presence when emotions run high, helping coaches stay centered while honoring the client's experience.
Practical Application in Coaching Sessions
Picture this: Your client suddenly pauses mid-sentence. Their eyes well up with tears, or perhaps their jaw tightens with unexpressed anger. This is where the real coaching magic happens – in these raw, authentic moments when emotions rise to the surface.
The Art of First Response
When emotions first surface, think of yourself as a steady lighthouse in a storm. Your presence becomes an anchor, creating safety through simple, powerful acknowledgments:
"I notice there's something powerful present right now."
"Take all the time you need."
"I'm here with you in this moment."
This is where our MIND™ model naturally flows into action. While maintaining steady eye contact (or culturally appropriate alternatives), ground yourself with conscious breaths. Your regulated nervous system becomes a silent invitation for your client to feel whatever needs to be felt. Then execute MIND™ to get into the heart and presence of what the client is feeling in that moment.
Dancing with Different Emotional Rhythms
Grief moves differently than anger. Anxiety has its own tempo. Here's how to move with each:
When Grief Speaks: Your presence becomes soft, spacious. The silence between words carries as much power as the words themselves. Simple questions emerge naturally:
"What does this sadness want you to know?"
"How would you like to honor this feeling?"
When Anger Rises: Your presence stays steady, unshaken. Your calm demeanor creates space for the fire of transformation:
"What truth lives beneath this anger?"
"How is this emotion protecting you?"
When Anxiety Swirls: Your grounded energy offers an anchor:
"What would help you feel more rooted right now?"
"How can we create a pocket of safety in this moment?"
The Power of Cultural Wisdom
Remember, emotions speak different languages across cultures. A client's cultural background might mean they express grief through stories rather than tears, or respect through silence rather than words. This is where the Jasiri Kweli approach shines – honoring each client's unique way of being with their emotional truth.
Staying Centered in the Storm
Think of your role as similar to a skilled sailor who knows how to read the weather while keeping the ship steady. You're not trying to calm the storm – you're creating a safe container where emotional weather patterns can move through naturally.
The Integration Dance
As emotions begin to settle, like waves finding their natural rhythm, gentle questions help integrate the experience:
"What's different now?"
"What wisdom has emerged?"
"How has this moment changed you?"
Remember, this isn't about doing it perfectly. It's about being authentically present with whatever emerges. Sometimes the most powerful coaching happens in the moments when we simply witness our clients' courage to feel deeply.
Professional Wisdom Notes:
Keep referral resources close for when emotions reveal deeper needs
Trust your client's innate wisdom to navigate their emotional landscape
Honor cultural expressions of emotion as pathways to truth
Maintain clear boundaries while demonstrating deep empathy
In the end, working with strong emotions isn't about technique – it's about trust. Trust in the process, trust in your client's resilience, and trust in the transformative power of witnessed emotion.
Share your comments, thoughts or questions in the comments.
Ready to deepen your practice? Visit www.drdawnreid.com for coaching or coach mentoring, and www.reidready.com to explore our ICF-accredited programs that teach these approaches in depth.
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